Upright & Stowed

AIDS Life/Cycle: My Story

I took this blurry, backwards picture of myself when I committed to riding in this year's AIDS Lifecycle, a 545-mile, 7-day bike ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles.  My T-shirt reads "The ride doesn't end until AIDS does."

I have long dreamed of doing the Lifecycle.  I will train for many hours and cover many miles between now and June 1st.  I may even get a hard butt for once in my life!

I invite you to join me on this journey, however you can.  Ride with me.   Or come to the party in LA when it's over (many family and friends are flying in).  Or simply send your good wishes and warm spirit.

More than anything, though, I invite you to SPONSOR MY RIDE, with a 100% tax-deductible donation that goes to two phenomenal organizations delivering AIDS-related services to thousands of people.  Anything you can give is appreciated, and it will guarantee you a spot in my heart and head across those 545 beautiful miles.

Read on for the story of my decision to ride.  I hope you are moved.  Because I am so excited, I can barely stand it!!!!   

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #1

I am dedicating my AIDS LifeCycle to 10 different people or groups.  Each has inspired me somewhere along the way.  Please feel free to sponsor my ride at any time.  As generously as you can.  Thanks!   And now on to my first inspiration...

This is Eric Brudner.  Eric was my freshman college roommate at Brown.  I met him in September 1979 and he was the first "out" gay person I'd ever met.  [Shocking, I know, but life was kind of sheltered in Clayton, Missouri.]  Eric grew up in Queens, and he went to Stuyvesant High School.  He was brilliant and he beamed with life.  I didn't know what to make of Eric.  He was street smart, and he had much more real world living behind him than I.  We did not become good friends at Brown, but I was secretly in awe of Eric. 

As you can imagine, a hottie like Eric got around, and he was an early victim of AIDS, dying in 1987.  Tragically, Eric's equally brilliant twin brother James died of AIDS in 1998.  James worked out at Equinox with me during the mid '90s and I was able to get to know him a bit, which helped me connect to Eric's spirit.  Shortly after Eric's death, his parents established the Eric Adam Brudner ’84 Memorial Concert at Brown University, now in its 20th year.   I knew Eric for a very short time, but he led his life boldly and bravely, and he has inspired me for years.   He'll be with me, all the way from San Francisco to LA.

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #2

I am dedicating my AIDS Life/Cycle to 10 different people or groups.  Each has inspired me somewhere along the way.  Please feel free to sponsor my ride at any time.  As generously as you can.  Thanks!   And now on to my second inspiration... 
The beautiful man with his arm around me is Jeff Kane, who I met in late 1998 and dated throughout 1999.  Jeff and I were cruising through Alaska's amazing Glacier Bay when this shot was taken.  Jeff was a very special soul.  He sang, he danced, he acted, he rode horses, he caused people to swoon … but most of all, he painted beautiful things that made you smile.  Jeff died of complications from AIDS in 2005.  Lucky for me, he was a part of my life for several years.  Just thinking about Jeff  – or seeing his smile in a photograph – can lift my spirits.  Most of the time we spent together was in LA.  So while Jeff will definitely be with me throughout my ride, he will really be there as I pedal into the City of Angels. 

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #3

As we continue in this series on my AIDS Life/Cycle inspirations, please feel free to sponsor my ride at any time.  Thanks!  and now, here's a bit about my third inspiration...

These are my nieces and nephews, with a few random parental siblings thrown in.  You’re looking at Amanda, Ashley, Angela, Jeremy, Elijah and Sylvie.  None of them lives anywhere near New York City, which makes my limited time with them all the more special.  I am riding in the Life/Cycle because I want these kids to mature into a world in which AIDS is retreating into the history books.  They’re growing up quickly, so there’s little time to lose in the fight for better AIDS prevention and education, better access to meds and, one day, a cure.  The joy of these six kids will be with me all the way from San Francisco to LA.  And maybe if I’m lucky, some of them will show up at the finish line!

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #4

I am dedicating my AIDS Life/Cycle to 10 different people or groups who have inspired me somewhere along the way.  Please feel free to sponsor my ride if you haven't already.  Let's talk about my fourth inspiration...

This is a picture of me and my friend Phil Kanner on the island of St. Maarten in 1992.  Phil is the only friend I've had who was born on the same day as me:  December 6th.  Phil was a Sagittarius to the core, and you can see from this shot  (click on it) what a warm and wonderful guy he was.  Phil died of complications from AIDS in 1995, just before protease inhibitors reached the market and changed everything for people with access to them.  One of the emotional highlights of my life was reading Phil’s name on the Mall in Washington DC during the last display of the AIDS Memorial Quilt (see pic).  Everyone who knew Phil was blessed by the experience.  Phil will be with me, all the way from San Francisco to LA.

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #5, 6 and 7

My AIDS Life/Cycle is dedicated to 10 different people or groups who have inspired me somewhere along the way.  Please feel free to sponsor my ride if you haven't already.  Let's talk about my fifth, sixth and seventh inspirations...

Is there any sweeter relationship than the one we share with our aunts?  I think not.  Aunts occupy that same warm and wonderful place as moms, but with a certain emotional remove that makes for something very special.  This first shot is me with my mother's sister, my Aunt Elaine.  She was a magical person, bursting with love.  Aunt Elaine was a strong and embracing personality whose most marked attribute was encouraging those around her to be their true best selves.  When you were with Aunt Elaine, you felt that your dreams could become reality.  That's a pretty powerful inspiration, as I embark on a 545 mile bike ride!   

The second shot is of my father's aunts (my Great Aunts) Mary and Ethel.  These two amazing women moved from St. Louis to Greenwich Village (in the 40s and 60s, respectively).  They loved New York with a passion that  made for an instant bond with me.  They were there for me unconditionally, whether I needed a Manhattan crash-pad during college, a home cooked meal after moving to New York, or a dose of mid-century NYC storytelling anytime.   Aunts Mary and Ethel are part of my NYC DNA, and I feel their spirits all the time.  The warmth, wisdom, and unconditional love of these three women will be with me, all the way from San Francisco to LA.

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #8

I am dedicating my AIDS Life/Cycle to 10 different people or groups who have inspired me somewhere along the way.  Please feel free to sponsor my ride if you haven't already.  Let's talk about my eighth inspiration...

There are approximately 36 million people living with the AIDS virus today.  For some of them, available treatments make the condition manageable.  For most, treatment remains out of reach, and the condition is a death sentence.  My ride is inspired by people living with HIV/AIDS, who must face each day with conviction and strength.  They will be with me, all the way from San Francisco to LA.   Image credit

AIDS/LifeCycle: My Inspirations, #9 and 10

My AIDS Life/Cycle is dedicated to 10 different people or groups who have inspired me somewhere along the way.  Please feel free to sponsor my ride if you haven't already.  Here are my final two sources of inspiration ...

No real surprise here:  My two sets of parents serve as my final inspiration and motivation for doing the ride.  I sing their praises often, so I won't repeat myself here.  Suffice it to say when you're as lucky as I am – having parents who shower you with love and encourage you to realize your dreams – you want to spread as much of that good stuff as possible.  From starting line to finish line, I know my parents will be there rooting for me.  And in turn, for the thousands who will benefit from the money raised this year.

I'm Riding My Bike from SF to LA

That's right, folks.  I have committed to riding 545 miles over one week in the AIDS/LifeCycle.  The ride kicks off on June 1st.  I've long dreamed of doing this ride, and 2008 is the year.  My goal is to raise $10,000, and I am confident that I can achieve it... with a little help from my friends.

My ride is in honor of 10 individuals or groups who have inspired me to take this challenge.  I will tell you about each of them in the coming days.  If you're ready to get started and sponsor me, you can do it here.   I am hoping for $100 as a minimum donation, but I encourage you to donate more if you possibly can.

Before I sign off, you're probably wondering who these two hunks are, peering out over their sunglasses or under their baseball caps.  Hunk Left is my friend Peter, who is the head of communications for the San Francisco AIDS Foundation.  Peter will be riding this year.  Hunk Right is my friend John, who lives in NYC and is my official cycle buddy. 

There you have it.  AIDS Life/Cycle 2008.  Great cause.  Great friends.  And great beefcake to boot.   :-)